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  • The Bell Jar: A Suicide Note?

    Here’s the first in my new blog series I’m calling Visitations, in which I blog about an extended stay with a book that I really should have read by now. I’d also like to offer the caveat that this review/critical analysis is spoiler heavy.

    George Pollucci’s appearance within The Bell Jar is a flicker within the pyre of Sylvia Plath’s only novel: he’s the would-be suicide who appears prior to the series of suicide attempts perpetrated by Plath’s narrator and alter ego Esther Greenwood. Pollucci is talked down from the ledge of a seven-story building, and after reading the documentation of the event in the local newspaper, Esther remarks

    I brought the newspaper close up to my eyes to get a better view of George Pollucci’s face, spotlighted like a three-quarter moon against a vague background of brick and black sky. I felt he had something important to tell me, and whatever it was just might be written on his face.[1]

    The inscrutable message writ on his face is similar to (but ought not to be confused with) that otherworldly wisdom present in an image of someone’s final moments of existence, just before life and perhaps the soul are about to peel away from the body and leave it in perpetual stillness. Still more confounding are the faces of suicides, where a storm of nerve is gathering, and it is inevitably one that, they hope, will soon yield to the eternal peace that they seek.

    In The Art of Suicide, author Ron M. Brown asserts that most of the mythical suicides of the ancient Greco-Roman world, such as Ajax, Phaedra and Dido, are depicted with “the body portrayed intact, and what is chiefly shown is intent, rather than the deed itself.”[2] Intent, if taken to its more motivational connotations, is what is paramount when it comes to suicides. They who succeed cannot report to us those final thoughts, and those of us who confront the great why that suicides leave behind are left to foggy, unsolvable labyrinths of intent, searching for meaning among what they conceivably believed was meaningless in the end.

    What tends to affect us most about suicides is that their deaths arrive with the essence of the preventable. The ancient Greeks perceived hanging as a distasteful form of suicide – which acquired further infamy in Western culture through Judas’ suicide after the dawn of Christianity[3] – because the act itself placed an irrevocable space between the earth and the suicide, leaving her dangling in the heavens and unable to return to the earth from which she had come.[4] This otherworldly space acquires a different symbolic meaning when taken with its effect upon suicide’s survivors, for they often feel the need to become a retroactively applying and life-sustaining bridge between heaven and the earth and reconnect her to the world. This essence of the preventable confronts us and makes us realize that our futility rests not in what we could’ve done or said to stay her hand, but in how we might have made ourselves available to listen to and alleviate the perhaps imperceptible pain that pushed her over the edge.

    There is a cultural etiquette for suicides, primarily in that they are expected to leave a note and supply a quiet echo of their intent, even though many suicides do not.[5] Those who do leave notes often explain their pain, apologize or, such as in the case of Mitchell Heisman, who left a 1,904-page suicide note,[6] protest society and the very nature of life itself. Many have argued that The Bell Jar is a suicide note and assign it the distinction of a slow farewell. It was written during the last year of Plath’s life and released the month before she gassed herself in her kitchen, and it recounts her own numerous suicide attempts through the translucency of fiction. However, the novel’s intentional nakedness echoes in the decades after her death as a quest for even the tiniest morsel of meaning among the meaningless.

    Esther begins her journey through madness with the execution of the Rosenbergs, with all its gruesome imagery, and lays down a steady beat of images and observations that fuse with the counterpoint of mortality and its perpetual decay. Her story is a Bildungsroman penned by a young author at heart – full of naïveté and premature, unearned knowledge that lacks experience – albeit a nastier brand of it, for it is less the becoming of self as it is unbecoming on account of the self, the act of shattering oneself into a thousand, mirrored pieces and trying to survive the process of becoming whole again without bleeding to death. The world itself is too much for her: smells and sounds are too human and fetid and alive, and films in Technicolor are too bright. She is surrounded by those who are in a perpetual state of reduction: from the young women also in the employ of Ladies’ Day magazine who are trying to lose a few pounds, to her Chemistry professor Mr. Manzi, who abbreviates the beauty of the natural world and its elements into equations and the shorthand of the Periodic Table. After she is rejected from the summer writing course on which she had set her heart, her future dissolves, and her entire world becomes inverted and distorted as if viewed from within a bell jar. In recounting one of her sickest, most defeated moments, Esther relates an episode from her time in the hospital after one of her many suicide attempts:

    “I can’t sleep.”

    They interrupted me. “But the nurse says you slept last night.” I looked around the crescent of fresh, strange faces.

    “I can’t read.” I raised my voice. “I can’t eat.” It occurred to me I’d been eating ravenously ever since I came to.[7]

    This manner of inversion continues within the novel: whereas Esther began with a brutal description of the electrocution of Rosenbergs, the path away from and back to her sanity and salvation lies in electroconvulsive therapy, as it was first misapplied by the poor Dr. Gordon and then properly administered by the good Dr. Nolan. Plath is, above all else, a poet, and this symbolic inversion is demonstrative her poet’s exploration of the oppression of the self and the self’s unstable, mad perceptions on the path to putting herself back together again.

    Plath’s fellow poet and suicide Anne Sexton wrote, “Suicide is, after all, the opposite of the poem.”[8] Poetry is, on many levels, beauty and sensuality rising through the structure of language. The Bell Jar is nothing if not intrinsically poetic, and to fill a narrative with such poetry demonstrates the author’s battle against succumbing to the chaos, the void, the numbness and the silence of death. Plath’s novel is a testament to hope, that there is a remedy available to right the cosmic misunderstanding that drove her to want to end her life in the first place.

    Within the first few pages of The Bell Jar, Esther writes

    I got such a kick out of all those free gifts showering on to us. For a long time afterward I hid them away, but later, when I was all right again, I brought them out, and I still have them around the house. I use the lipsticks now and then, and last week, I cut the plastic starfish off the sunglasses case for the baby to play with.[9]

    The key to understanding The Bell Jar is that Esther has survived and even gone on to become a mother to a child. The novel is hardly a suicide note but a record of surviving the flames of one’s own personal hell in order to be reborn, for in the beginning, Esther establishes a clear intent to relocate joy among seemingly small, insignificant things and live despite a seeming prevalence of meaninglessness. Taken superficially, the look on Pollucci’s face that captures Esther’s attention might be interpreted as the look of someone about to confront mortality and embrace the meaninglessness of life, but the message she receives from him is quite different. The Bell Jar is a protraction of Pollucci’s look: the curiosity that urges one to continue on the quest for meaning rather than slip away.

    The tragedy of her triumph is that it wasn’t enough. Plath continued writing until the days before her death, and if one is searching for that final look before she stepped into the void beyond us, one only needs to read the poems in Ariel to glimpse the literary fatigue and unwavering intent in the eyes. None of us will ever know how The Bell Jar would have been received had Plath rediscovered her own curiosity, as it is impossible to separate it from her sad end. Even though the novel suggests otherwise, its darker moments ring as a recurring moment of futility for the observer who follows the desperate, determined intentions of Esther Greenwood through to the final action of Sylvia Plath, where we wonder if anyone could have been a bridge that united heaven and earth and saved her.


    References

    1 Plath, Sylvia (1971). The Bell Jar. New York: Harper & Row. p. 152. ISBN 0-06-017490-0.
    2 Brown, Ron (2001). The Art of Suicide. London: Reaktion Books Ltd. p. 33. ISBN 1-86189-105-9.
    3 Zweig, Ben (February 29, 2012). “The Despair and Suicide of Judas in Medieval Art.” Retrieved September 15, 2012.
    4 Brown, p. 45.
    5 Shioiri, T., Nishimura, A., Akazawa, K., Abe, R., Nushida, H., Ueno, Y., Kojika-Maruyama, M. and Someya, T. (2005). “Incidence of note-leaving remains constant despite increasing suicide rates.” Psychiatry and Clinical Neurosciences, 59: 226–228. doi: 10.1111/j.1440-1819.2005.01364.x. Retrieved September 15, 2012.
    6 The Huffington Post (September 24, 2010). “Man Who Killed Himself On Harvard’s Campus Left 1,904-Page Note.” The Huffington Post. Retrieved September 15, 2012.
    7 Plath, p. 198.
    8 Simon, John (December 1991). “Connoisseur of madness, addict of suicide: On Anne Sexton.” The New Criterion. Retrieved September 15, 2012.
    9 Plath, p. 4.

  • On Blogging

    I was once a blogger. It was during the years in which was benched at desk jobs with very, very little responsibility, and I was afforded the luxury of being able to cut my writerly milk teeth by means of web-based rant, analysis and confession. My life and my perceptions have changed since then, and I’ve not blogged with any sort of frequency in several years and good luck tracking down anything I wrote back then.

    A couple of years ago, I launched this site with the intention of getting back into the practice. I created blog posts written by one of my characters from my Ministers of Grace series and provided histories for various angels and demons. However, not even a year later, I abandoned it due to time constraints and went back to writing novels, poems and screenplays.

    Blogging ought to be considered a medium unto itself with literary potentials that are still being explored, in part because it requires its own skill set that separates it from other forms of writing. Writing on command is a great part of it, which is what makes it sister to journalism, but the fluid, mercurial nature of the internet is what sets it apart, for blog posts can be searched and found and updated and edited and modified, even deleted.

    Self-censorship and all other excuses aside, I’ve come to realize that I need to rekindle my facility with the medium. I’ve no intention to blog about my writing process, because I can’t imagine anything more boring to anyone but me. My life is off-limits: I’m a private person, and if you want to know what’s going on with me, you can rather safely intuit my life’s events based upon the matter of what I write. I’ve considered writing about things of a political and social nature, but as they inspire the wrath that curls inside my pen and fuels my creative fires, I reckon I’d drive myself completely insane by consistently focusing on such darkness. Besides, I prefer expounding my opinions via fiction.

    Therefore, I’d like to announce the start of a new blog series. I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to keep it up – it could last through the end of the year, or I might be able to keep it going indefinitely, who knows? – but during the third week of the month, I intend to provide a review and/or critical analysis of a book that I probably really should have read by now. You might be surprised: my late teens/early twenties were spent falling in love with Oscar Wilde, Rainer Maria Rilke, Virginia Woolf, Tony Kushner, Anne Sexton, Lawrence Durrell, C.P. Cavafy, Vladimir Nabokov and, last but certainly not least, Jorge Luís Borges. Weren’t you, too? I’ll be posting the first of this new series on Monday, kicking off the festivities with a post about Sylvia Plath’s The Bell Jar.

    I am once again a blogger. Hope you enjoy…

    ♥ EAB

  • Pavlovian

    I put down this 13 x 13 after coming to terms with some of my social conditioning last night. I’ve included an audio file of me reading it. ♥ EAB

    pavlovian

    Pavlovian

    Pessimism visits me with lightning flashes, and
    I’m immediately convinced the storm’s on its way,
    so much so, I hear raindrops’ pittering-pat against
    the window. I can’t help it, I brace for the worst’s worst.
    The rain knocks out a familiar percussive pattern,
    therefore I await the shift: the roof will soon fly off,
    and I’ll be carried away by the mercilessness
    of wind. I can already sense the lift in the gut,
    where I’m propelled far beyond the deep of hopelessness.
    I stand there, in the center of the room, with muscles
    tensed for the impact, where I muse why I must throw a
    threadbarren projection of a two-dimensional
    past over the laughing, breathing child of the present.

  • May (82nd & 5th)

    I was in New York last week, and I threw down a freewrite while sitting on the steps of the Met. I’ve reshaped that aimless prose into a seven-stanza poem in which I limited the syllabic count of each line to seven different possibilities based upon the relative and transposed spacetime coordinates that applied to that particular freewrite: 2, 5, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14.

    May (82nd & 5th)

    in this city of exponents
    where the mathematics are visible in everything
    men of the twentieth century vowed to touch the sky
    for economy
    the economy of spacetime that everyone knows here
    where time is the unifier
    of breadth and length and depth

    nature finds her way
    to express biology among all this artifice
    through the constant music of movement: choral, orchestral
    the regulation of involuntary processes
    through veins in marble
    capillaries in cracks in the pavement
    platelets in asphalt
    white blood cells in granite
    the nervous system
    where there is still so much more below than above
    and the electrical currents
    of internal regulation
    boast of immortality and collapse
    over the ether of dashed dreams

    the paradox of impermanent permanence
    and vice versa, of course
    encoded in the double helix within the
    intersection of concrete seams
    expanded through the scaffolding
    that has been used time and time and again
    to construct, to rebuild and to reimagine
    that which has already been through
    the same process of rethinking
    at least a dozen times
    generation after generation
    of dreams and aspirations that
    tangle in the rearrangement
    of everything and
    dizzily collapse at the feet
    of the god of all things temporary
    the god of all things

    but the temporary and the tiny find ways
    to open up, to hold big, significant things
    through the blessings of
    economy and
    mathematics and
    biology and
    impermanence so
    that all of the world’s timeless principles
    are reduced into a thimble
    a lifetime within
    a few elongated, gossamer moments that
    stretch out over the synapses to snap
    at the cold and recall
    beauty
    and a mark on the hip that gets explained away
    when the aches of autumn
    drive the sun deeper and deeper into the horizon

    the economic blessing of
    a shared moment is recounted
    so that the insignificant
    becomes part of your memory
    of you

    and what seemed so small
    is now much larger than originally thought

    there’s a whisper inside traded glances
    (you were there, too, weren’t you?)

    ♥ EAB

  • The Art of Storytelling

    The structure for this little mixed medium étude is a little different: the first part’s got twelve syllables per line, with the third stanza featuring rhyming couplets, followed by the prose in the second part. That’s just the only way it’d work.

    “The Art of Storytelling”

    I.

    The arrangements spell out every prickly, crumpled
    inconsistency that shuffles in the hollows,
    for this is how the mind works: mirrored images.

    (Shhhhhhh look for me between the lines. I’m always there.)

    “…there are those times, like when it’s almost too much to
    awaken from your deeper slumbers to the cool,
    dragged out rhythms of your own breath, like when the best
    move you’ve got is to make that figure, the one pressed
    up against the opposite side of the glass, run
    as fast as she can in the other direction.”

     

    II.

    “Last week, I was asked to contribute a tale to a friend’s anthology – a ghost story, to be precise. I knocked it out without any hesitation, redrafted it, revised it, and handed it off to my friend with all due diligence and respect. When I presented it, I offered with it the apologetic proviso that I’d be more than happy to redraft, revise, and even reimagine it entirely so that it suited the artistic purposes of him who requested it.”

    “He told me that as long as I was happy with it, it would suit him.”

    “I replied that I was not happy with the work at all. I found the story itself to be a rather grim protraction of what was going on inside my head. The metaphors I’d layered within it were far from pleasing, for they’d served as an expression of the biochemically-inspired and situationally-catalyzed depressive episode that’s been occupying my head. Everything within the story had served as a means by which to work through that particular sadness, so that when I was ready to submit it, it struck me as an opus that I wasn’t happy with at all because of what it represented, even though I was the only one who knew what it meant. But it was honest work, for it came from within and was the best use of the billowy darkness within, and for that, I could be proud.”

    They say you should write what you know. The phrase, taken at face value, is most often cited by unimaginative writers as an excuse to mire their work in the mundanity and profane self-absorption of everyday life. Whoever coined it bartered meaning for brevity and lost its matter, for the phrase really ought to express that when it comes right down to it, it’s unavoidable to write about anything other than whatever you’re trying to work out in your head, maybe even forgive yourself for. The most you can do when perpetrating such unintentional nakedness is to embrace the process for what it is: write down the barest truth of what you know.

    ♥ EAB

  • Either Side of Silver

    …because. A 12 x 9 x 2. ♥

    Either Side of Silver

    Our words tangled over the distance, after they
    provided the set-up and we tried to deliver
    the punchline, but the joke was on us: distances
    aren’t bridged with slippery things like will. What I loved
    in those wintry days was the mere thought of you, and
    your laughter, curled up in my imagination,
    your keystrokes composing a crisp sarabande that
    transposed the keys of your sleeplessness into my
    low register and then back into your tenor.

    Those memories exist twice, separate, on either
    side of mirrors pointed away from each other:
    as listless dogs, napping on the cool stony floors
    of a summer house, stirring when the sunlight floats
    over their repose; and as ether, above the
    castles and cathedrals of modernity that
    hold up the skies, where every tittering whisper
    we passed between us hovers in diaphanous
    quiet, too scattered, too far removed to bind us.

    either side of silver

  • The Episode

    Ecco: a little Fibonacci-inspired syllabic poem – 3, 5, 8, 13 and back again – about getting stuck.

    the episode.

    metronome
    for days without shape,
    spent on the underside of my
    solipsistic wanderings, where the deep’s arrived at
    my door, where all good sense has sunk
    beneath the weight of
    time, ticking.

    the episode

    A side note: back in May 1999, I went to the Tate Gallery in London, where they were exhibiting “The Deep” by Jackson Pollock. Every time I think of the deep as a concept, I always remember this painting, if only because white has never looked so black and black never so white as on this canvas. It reminds me that, ultimately, it’s all a matter of perspective. ♥ EAB

  • The Snow Storm

    Voilà: a brand new 10×10 syllabic poem. ♥ EAB

    The Snow Storm
    Despite all sophistication, it comes
    to replace the pattered brilliance of night
    with the uniformity of a cloud,
    and it settles on expressing itself
    as clean, discrete crystals that seek the still,
    quiet surfaces outside my window.
    All the world’s branches, as intimate as
    a widow’s fingers on the graveyard fence,
    crack against the glass, their messages tapped
    in secret rhythms: “It’s winter. At last.”

     

    The Snow Storm

  • Misjudgment

    Now that the holidays are over, it’s time to get back to work! Here’s a new poem. It’s a terzanelle—a form that’s a hybrid of terza rima and the villanelle—and below is my most recent experiment with the form, eleven syllables per line. I also wrote it out by hand and scanned it in.

    “Misjudgment”

    It doesn’t look at all like it was meant to:
    I touched the thread’s hissing, forked tongue to my own,
    then smoothed out the fray with my fingers and drew

    it through the iris of the needle. (The drone
    started here.) I knotted the ends—and again,
    touched the threads’ hissing, forking tongues to my own—

    and beginning, I pushed the sharp through one end,
    back once more, embroidering the pattern for her.
    (I’d started by knotting the ends, once again.)

    Stitch into line, line to object, object for
    pattern, pattern in picture: rhythm as rote,
    back once more, to produce the picture for her.

    Repetition drives a routine. I devote
    a stitch, ’til I slip and knot in the wrong spot.
    Patterns fail: no picture when rhythm is rote.

    The fingers bleed, fibers fray, and I forgot
    to smooth out the ripples with my fingers, too.
    The stitches slip, there’s a spot in the wrong knot,
    and nothing looks how it had been meant for you.

    Happy New Year, everyone! ♥ EAB

    Misjudgment

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